


Winter

by InfamousWhitePaws



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:36:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25414777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InfamousWhitePaws/pseuds/InfamousWhitePaws
Summary: I wrote this based off a few specific lines from the song Winter by Khalid.Part of a SongFic Collab with Haikyuu Creations(On tumblr)
Relationships: Azumane Asahi/Nishinoya Yuu
Comments: 1
Kudos: 12





	Winter

**_But the days get harder in November_ **

Nishinoya sat at the dining room table, shadowed by something blocking the desk lamp aiming towards it. He stared at the other side. The shadow covering him was created by the larger man standing, hunched over said table, sketching and muttering to himself. Glancing at the clock, Yuu shook his head. 

“Come on, big bear, it’s time to go to sleep,” He stood, tucking the chair under the table and moving over. 

“Just a bit more, I have it almost down…”

“You said that 20 minutes ago, it’s nearly 2:30 and we both have an early morning.” 

“But Yuu-”

“Asahi. It’s time for bed.”

The other man stood, to his full height, and stared down at Yuu with eyes hooded from exhaustion. He reached out and pulled Yuu close, before leaning down and resting his forehead against the other’s shoulder. 

“I’m sorry, but it’s nearly the Spring Season release and I just have a few more pieces.” He sighed. 

Yuu reached up and patted his head, his thick hair that was usually tied up was down and spreading all over. He ran his hands through it slowly, slightly untangling it. 

“It’s alright, but it’s time to sleep or you’ll make mistakes.” 

Both of the men stood there for a few minutes, just basking in each others’ presence before Yuu pulled Asahi towards the bedroom and they slowly walked. Asahi wasn’t fighting, but he wasn’t making an effort to move either. Nishinoya was basically dragging him and when they finally made it to bed, he tucked them both in before turning off the light. 

Yuu turned onto his side to say goodnight and was met with an already passed out Asahi. A faint chuckle escaped as he just kissed him and went to sleep as well.

The next morning, Nishinoya woke to a cold and empty bed. He bunched up the blankets around him and just laid there, staring at the pillow beside him. After an unspecified amount of time, he turned around and read the clock as 8 am. Even going to bed so late they woke up early. He sat up slowly and listened for any life in their apartment, but only silence was there. His sigh almost echoed from how quiet it really was. Only the faint world waking up outside was heard. 

Again he stared at the empty spot on the bed and pouted his lower lip. Nishinoya wasn’t happy with Asahi escaping from the house without so much as a goodbye kiss, but for the past few weeks, this is how things have gone. Even though he’s mentioned it, Asahi doesn’t seem to let it stick. Nishinoya would have to sew it in for him to remember. 

“I really should be used to this by now,” He muttered, making his way to the bathroom to start his morning routine. The sound of the shower filling the silence of their apartment. 

**_Love grows colder in the winter_ **

The fresh snow outside wasn’t nearly as cold as the inside of their apartment. Nishinoya pulled up his turtleneck sweater over his mouth and turned around. The silence was deafening, but there was nothing he could do. The clock said 7:30 pm on Friday. Date night started at 6 pm, every other Friday of the month. This would be the 3rd date night Asahi has missed so far, and Yuu knows the routine now. He’ll come home a few more hours later, exhausted from working and plop down on the couch, only to jump up and find Yuu before profusely apologizing and begging for forgiveness. 

He doesn’t mind. Since he knows the Spring Season releases are right around the corner, Asahi is working with everything he has to get his pieces to perfection. This would be Asahi’s second time in a big name runway show since graduating 3 years ago. He needed this to be more than perfect. Yuu on the other hand was working odd shifts at the sports store a few blocks away. Tanaka had suggested it for the time being, to keep money coming in. 

It was working for now, but Yuu was getting antsy and his need to move and explore was starting to put ideas in his mind. He hated them, but also loved them at the same time. He had so many ideas of places to go and things to do, but his life was here with Asahi. That’s what he told himself. Staring back out at the snow, feeling the cold in his bones, he wasn’t so sure now. 

Yuu had settled on the couch to watch some tv, but had fallen asleep by the time Asahi returned home. It was much later than his usual late nights. Asahi checked his watch to see it was nearly 11 pm. He set his bags down, took off his boots and winter gear before slowly heading to the living room. He rounded the corner and froze. 

He stared at the small figure curled up on the couch, his heart sinking. Glancing over, he saw the dinner plates and things set up on the table then looked back to see the stack of movies they planned to watch that night. 

“Yuu..” He murmured, slowly walking over and kneeling in front of him on the couch. He reached up and brushed the hair dyed from his eyes, before trailing his hand down the side of Yuu’s face and cupping his cheek. He felt his eyes sting as he sat and stared. It seemed a bit creepy but Asahi knew he messed up again by missing another date night. He knew that. 

Nishinoya finally stirred and cracked his eyes open. Asahi pulled his hand away, but didn’t get up. 

“Azu, hey, you’re home. I’m sorry... I tried to stay up for you.” He stretched his arms up and yawned at once, leaning forward and lowering his arms around Asahi’s neck. Asahi in return leaned forward and grabbed Yuu by the torso, pulling him against his body.

“I’m sorry Yuuyuu… I’m so so sorry.” 

**_All the things you say, I'll remember_ **

Yuu was standing in the middle of their living room. His eyes were wide and red, tears still flowing after minutes of staring into nothing. But it wasn’t really nothing; it was the door Asahi had stormed out of. Two weeks before Valentine’s Day. All he had asked for was an extra date night before Asahi went off to Paris for fashion week. He still had a few to make up from missing last year. Yuu thought it was a reasonable request but when Asahi looked at him with such disgust...He didn’t know what to do. 

He didn’t know what to do when Asahi started yelling at how he can’t waste time on date nights when he has a show to prepare for. When Asahi ranted and raved about how he’ll be “too damn busy for anything but the show, including you”. Or when after he was done, he grabbed his work things, winter gear and stormed out, leaving Nishinoya to stare after him while being stuck like a statue. 

“A-Azu…” 

The single word echoed through the apartment and Nishinoya’s ears, before he slowly sat down on the floor and cried his heart out. What was happening? After all the doubts Nishinoya had during December were washed away, the tears now had them flowing back in and just making him sob harder.

He didn’t want to think about this, nor have the idea on the table in the first place. But with Asahi coming home less and less or so late that Yuu went to sleep and woke up alone, it wasn't hard to think about. 

When the tears finally stopped and Nishinoya stood up, he still felt heavy. His world was rolling away and all he could do was grasp helplessly after it. He made his way to the bathroom and settled on taking a steaming hot shower to wash the past few hours away. If only that worked.

Once he was dry and dressed, with a towel draped around his neck, the only thing he thought about was cooking dinner. It was already later than usual but with the schedule set, he would be eating alone either way. 

Having all the ingredients ready, Yuu still went ahead and made what he planned for dinner. It was Asahi’s favorite Tonkotsu Ramen. This was supposed to be a night as casual as any but Yuu had had the urge to make his favorite. While making the meal he felt his eyes stinging again, but he blamed it on something in the food. He couldn’t cry again. He didn’t want to cry again. 

Once the ramen was done and ready, Nishinoya set the table for two and sat down to eat. He wasn’t sure if Asahi would return at all this time, but he wasn’t about to let him come home to no dinner. It was still freezing cold out and this would have been the perfect meal for Asahi to warm up with. He ate slowly, the hope that his big bear would come back and they could finish dinner together, keeping him upright. 

Even as he went for a small second bowl, and the first left for Asahi got cold, Yuu didn’t give up that he’d be back. Even when he put the uneaten ramen away with the leftovers and packed them for their lunches tomorrow, he watched the door for movement. Even after cleaning up the kitchen and settling on the couch with some of their favorite shows’ reruns, he kept the volume low, listening closely for the lock on the door. 

**_Promise that you'll keep my love with ya_ **

The next time the door opened to the apartment, Asahi just wanted to hop into the shower before running back out to the studio. He hasn’t slept in a proper bed for two nights and it was starting to put a strain on his work. He couldn’t properly move and bend the way it took for him to be measuring and cutting and sewing clothes. 

Stripping off his winter gear and dropping the bags of half-done clothes, he let his hair out of the bun and headed straight to the bathroom. Asahi took a classic long hot shower, letting the water run through his hair and relax his muscles. Once he was out, dried and dressed, and going back for his clothes did he stop to listen to the apartment. It was much more quiet than he remembered. Yuu wouldn't let the place be so quiet unless he was sleeping, and he was even loud at that. Asahi slowly walked towards the living room but found no signs of life. He checked the kitchen and it was clean and void of a body. The bathroom he just left was obviously vacant. Finally reaching the bedroom, Asahi let the door swing open to find a very foreign sight. 

Nishinoya was sitting on their bed, leaning against the raw wood headboard. His knees were pulled to his chest and his nose was hidden under the sweater he wore. His usual bright eyes and loud mouth were gone, replaced with half open eyes staring into the city. 

Asahi leaned against the door frame and watched him. If Nishinoya had noticed him, he didn’t make it known. It took Asahi moving closer to the bed for Yuu to look at him. Now that he did, Asahi could tell he had been crying. His eyes were red and looked raw from being rubbed, his lower lip was also red and swollen from being chewed on. Even his cheeks were still tinted pink. Yuu didn’t cry. The only time he ever did was from laughing too hard. 

Sitting on the corner of the bed, Asahi reached for Nishinoya. When he didn’t respond Asahi grabbed and pulled him against his chest. Nishinoya stayed still, just flopping against his chest, probably enjoying the heat of his skin. 

“Yuu.” 

Asahi doesn’t know what else to say, but Nishinoya doesn’t give him a chance to think. He looks up with that signature smile, though it’s a foreign version of it.. 

“It’s okay Azu. It really is. I think we’ve had enough time to realize this.” 

Asahi felt his heart breaking. He also knew this was the truth. He nodded but tucked Yuu back under his chin, just holding him there. 

“I truly am sorry.”

Now it was Asahi’s turn to cry and stare out into the city. Nishinoya was right and he hated it. Hated every part of it. But he couldn’t hold onto him when it was holding them both back. It wasn’t fair to Nishinoya, and it wasn’t fair to him. The boys curled up together, using this as their last moments together.

**_Promise that you'll keep my love with ya_ **

After two long months, Nishinoya was staring at his suitcase in the living room. He had decided what he was going to do with his life and whittled down his belongings to fit in a carry on suitcase and a duffle bag. Asahi had barely been home with the different fashion weeks going on, and working on his new lines. It hadn’t been like one would expect living with an ex. They barely saw each other and when they did, they managed to fall into friendly chatter like before.

This was the final Friday Asahi had off before flying away for two weeks, and Nishinoya was flying away for good. They decided to have one final date night, to close everything up and say goodbye. 

Yuu was already feeling choked up about it. It wasn’t like they hadn’t talked things out and settled what needed to be. But for the past two years, they had lived comfortably together and nothing was ever wrong. Although, that was the exact thing that was wrong with their relationship and it just snapped all at once. 

Setting the table, Nishinoya made sure it was the best damn date night they’ve ever had. He had two tall candles and the best plates they had, he set up background lights and brought out the navy velvet table cloth they only used for holidays. The silverware was also their holiday set. He had gone down to the store to get a small flower arrangement and perfect vase to fit it in for the center of the table. 

Nishinoya thought Asahi might feel bad with how fancy the set up was, but they also wouldn’t be dressing up so it still felt normal to them. They had agreed on that part. The meal would again be Asahi’s favorite, and dessert would be Nishinoya’s favorite soda flavored gari-gari popsicle. He promised to tell Asahi everything he planned to do and keep him updated along the way. Asahi promised the same, and maybe begged a little to have Yuu model for him whenever he visited home.

When Asahi returned to the apartment, he was definitely shocked to see the place. The loss of Nishinoya was coming to a head and he wasn’t sure if he was ready anymore. Even though he hadn’t been home for weeks at a time lately, the change was still scary. He had to get used to a quiet home, with no one to greet him. No one to keep him warm at night. No one to be a mess and play fight with while they did chores. At the same time, his eyes scanning the places empty of Nishinoya’s things, he began to feel calmer knowing they were parting this way. They weren’t having a messy breakup with someone storming away. It was mutual and agreed on. It was hard to do but they were happy to understand. 

His eyes finally landed on the table set up Nishinoya had. It was extravagant. Their holiday tablecloth and silverware were out, the lights on the wall and candles in the middle made it feel much warmer. Then he smelt the food and knew what was coming. 

“Yuuyuu, you didn’t have to prepare dinner.” He called, setting his things down and entering the kitchen. He caught Yuu scooping the ramen into their bowls, that smile back on his face. 

“I know I know, but since I’m the one who won’t be around for a while anymore, I wanted to cook one last meal here. As part of a final memory and a thank you.”

Asahi felt his eyes sting. Even now he was still the brightest person Asahi ever knew, and he was going to miss this light in his life. Shaking his head, he followed as Yuu led him to the table and set down their bowls. Asahi pulled Yuu’s chair for him before seating himself.

They enjoyed dinner like before, eating and chatting and laughing. It was fresh and light. None of the heaviness of their lives invading this time. Nishinoya started telling Asahi his plans of going to Italy, since May was the beginning of Marlin fishing season he’d make it in time. He would have enough time and money to settle in and get used to the lifestyle, make some friends and find a job. He had no doubts or worries about it. Asahi still loves that about him. Yuu never doubted what he could do once he set his mind to it. Italy was far away, but Asahi mentioned how heavy into fashion they were and he’d for sure be visiting sometime. 

Once dinner was over and cleaned up, their popsicles finished and the clock reading 6 pm, the two stood at the doorway. Nishinoya had explained that Italy was 7 hours ahead of Japan, so he would land roughly around 2 pm their time. They stood in silence for a bit before reaching to embrace each other. The tears were hot and silent. It was one of those cries you can’t stop no matter how hard you tried even though it’s going to be okay and you know it’s not over forever. Nishinoya pulled back and looked up at Asahi, his signature smile tainted with tears. Asahi smiled through his own tears. He was sure going to miss having that smile around.


End file.
